FAQs

Six to eight weeks before the wedding for a local celebration, and ten to twelve weeks out for a destination wedding or one over a holiday weekend. Send save the dates separately, months earlier, if travel or time off work is involved.

Four to six weeks before the wedding, not the week of. That gives you enough runway to chase down non-responders and still get a final headcount to your caterer, who usually needs it seven to ten days out.

No. The common, low-friction line is: plus-ones for married couples, engaged couples, and long-term partners (living together or dating a year or more), and single invitations for everyone else. Apply it consistently across your whole list, not case by case.

Whichever way you go, apply it uniformly rather than inviting some families' kids and not others', which is the version that actually causes offense. If you're going child-free, say so directly on the invitation ('Adult reception') rather than leaving it to be inferred.

Ask each parent directly whether they're comfortable being seated near their ex rather than assuming. For the ceremony program and any parent dances, it's fine to list or include both without ranking; for seating, a buffer of one row or table between them (not obviously so) avoids most friction on the day.

The old convention (bride's family covers the ceremony and reception, groom's family covers the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon) is now more the exception than the rule. Most couples today either split costs themselves, split with both families by whatever proportion works, or one family takes the lead. There's no longer a 'default' worth assuming, so it's worth an early, direct conversation rather than guessing.

No, but framing matters. A named fund ('Honeymoon Fund', 'New Home Fund') reads as a request with a purpose; an unlabelled cash ask reads as presumptuous to some guests. Put it on your wedding website rather than the invitation itself either way, since printed registry information on an invite is still considered poor etiquette by a lot of guests.

Venue and photographer first, ideally nine to twelve months out for popular dates and locations, since both tend to book up furthest in advance. Catering, florist, and music typically have more flexibility and can usually be locked in four to six months out, though sought-after vendors in any category will fill their calendar earlier.